Come Friday, September 23, 2016
The Brothers of PXL Invite You to Join Us
For Our 6021 Fall Weekend Clampout at
The Bald Eagle Ranch in Havilah!
O.K. So we didn't get the Boy Scout camp in the mountains this time, but who needs tender feet when you can party with eagles? Not that we're likely to see any in Kern County, but it really won't matter much because come Friday, September 23rd, you'll get your chance to Clamp the weekend away at the Bald Eagle Ranch with the finest feathered friends in all of ECV -- the storied Brethren of Peter Lebeck.
It's been two years since we last made it up to Havilah, and for those of you who have never been, Havilah is a historic little town in the mountains south of the Kern River Valley and site of the original county seat back in the 1860's before Bakersfield got all uppity.
Our most esteemed brother and XNGH, Wes Kutzner and his Widder Janet own the Bald Eagle, and once again they have been kind enough to extend their hospitality to PXL. In the fall of 2014, the Bald Eagle was where we initiated ECV's first and only Tittie Bar, and our Humbug Luis "Vaquero" Bouza tells us that he intends to rechristen it with a Friday afternoon "meet and greet" that he's calling "Margaritafest 1.0." Think of it as a Lebowskifest, only without the Dude and without the tequila. The chapter will provide the frothy lemony goodness, Louie's officers will potluck the snacks, and we'll see if the main ingredient shows up. Somehow even though we are a BYOB chapter that never seems to be a problem at PXL. Just think of us as the "Stone Soup of Clamperdom." You don't even need a bowling shirt to be invited!
As usual bring something to keep warm, including your own adult libations. While you can't expect the ranch to be green in September, it's a time of year that the mountains are much more hospitable than the desert or even the valley floor, so expect our weekend at the Bald Eagle to be a good time and place to beat the heat. Container fires won't be allowed this time out, but propane heaters should be OK. The recent fires caused the loss of 40 nearby homes so given the dry conditions this one should be a no-brainer.
The Clampsite at Bald Eagle Ranch is an oak studded meadow with plenty of room and flat spaces for RVs and tents. It features easy access for large vehicles, and has enough room to accommodate 100 Clampers whether spread out or bunched together for easy, relaxing friendliness -- that is, when you're not hanging out at PXL's centrally located cookshack and libations center.
Our goal at Peter Lebeck is to leave no one out. With about seventy guys at one of our Doin's it's hard to get lost and hard not to make new friends. So make sure to join us for our group activities, like Louie's Meet and Greet. We set up camp midmorning on Friday, and everyone, including your PBC, is invited to pitch-in when we set-up our kit. We call it "Petey's Flying Circus," and it's more than worth the price of admission just for the camaraderie. We feed you from Friday night through Sunday morning, we have a raffle on Saturday Night after an awesome dinner, and we make sure your PBC gets plenty of individual attention and truly learns what being a Clamper is all about.
At PXL we are known for our food, and this Clampout is no exception. Your rub always includes four full, hot meals starting with Friday night dinner, plus a continental breakfast on Sunday. We're changing things up a little bit now that XXNGH Timbo Gillespie has hung up his apron, though he's promised to continue cooking the beans.
That said, this will be the second time out for our new Clampchef Kenton "Airdale" Miller, and he got rave reviews for his performance at our Spring Clampout at the Sh*t Howdy Ranch. Friday's "roadkill" turned out to be Tacos á la Airdale. Saturday morning's Graybeards'Potluck Breakfast included steaming hot pancakes fresh off the griddle, and this fall, he's expanded the Saturday Night Dinner Menu to include your choice of entrée -One Pound Ribeye Steak or ¼ Barbequed Chicken - plus all the fixings, including beans. Yup. After all these years, it took the new birddog on the block to figure out that guys who don't eat red meat shouldn't have to be shy about it. Airdale cried, "fowl!" And we agreed. Next stop, "Vegetarian Roadkill?" Probably not. But that's up to Airdale.
Also we don't want you to forget about Saturday Morning's Graybeards' Potluck Breakfast -- we have the eggs - and now, apparently pancakes as well -- you bring meat, tortillas, etc. -everybody wins. Airdale will probably follow that up with more meat for lunch, and then it's on to dinner!
Saturday afternoon features one of the best PBC interrogations and HOCOs in all of Clamperdom - lubricated by the supine suckers themselves. Just make sure that if you are bringing a PBC - and we do encourage that very much - make sure the sucker comes prepared! Give him the PBC Handbook ahead of time. You'll find it by following the links on the Fall 2016 Doin's Page. Then make sure he brings us an appropriate bribe that will suitably impress all of us, along with a five minute long historical -- or hysterical -- presentation. You know the drill. If you do your part, we guarantee, that by the end of the ritual we'll be laughing our collective butts off and shouting "Satisfactory!" until we sound like a bunch of jackasses.
So what are you waiting for? At PXL camaraderie comes first. We'd be honored to have you join us, and you'll be glad you did. To find out more, just go back to our Fall 2016 Doin's Page where you can get a copy of our infallible fillable flyer, sign-up electronically, and grab additional details, including directions. And whatever you do - DON'T GET LOST! We'll be waiting for you.
To read about Clamping with Peter Lebeck in Kern County, just read on.
ABOUT CLAMPING WITH PETER LEBECK
Kern County is a big place and it covers all kinds of terrain: from the driest portions of the Mojave Desert, to the snowiest pine forests of the Sierra Nevada; from the oak woodlands of Walker Basin to the still wild grasslands of the San Joaquin Valley. Then of course there is Fort Tejon, Pine Mountain, the Kern River Valley, the Tehachapis, and…you get the drift. Kern County IS a BIG and interesting place.
And needless to say, we do try to get around. So if you are looking for something different, always make sure to look us up when you are planning your Clamping Calendar. If you've Clamped the desert, try the mountains. If you've Clamped the mountains, try the desert. But always make an effort check with us because we may be going someplace you'd really, really enjoy, and we do get around.
PXL Clampouts are not so large that you'll ever feel lost, and not so small that you'll ever feel like you're crashing someone's private party. Brothers visiting from other chapters are always made to feel welcome, and we especially encourage you to drop by if you live in Kern County or the adjoining areas of southern and central California.
At Peter Lebeck we plan two, full-weekend Clampouts every year, one in the spring and the other in the fall, and we favor overnight outings because we believe it is the surest way to make sure that each of our Brothers makes it home safely. At Peter Lebeck we also believe that Clamping is as much about plaquing as it is about camping and camaraderie, so we try to mount at least one erection every year and we try to Clamp near by. So won't you join us for the adventure? We'll make sure you get an extra helping of Timbo's beans.