The Greybeards of PXL, in Communion with
Our Noble Grand Humbug Myrl "Doc" Wallace
Heartily Invite You to Our 57th Fall Doin's at
Franklin Field Arena as we Plaque McKittrick's
September 20-23, 6023 (2018 C.E.)
Peter Lebeck's 57th Annual Fall Doin's is headed your way, and if you miss this one we know you'll find yourself making penance with a whole year's worth of self-flagellation, not to mention the mysterious flatulence that will light up the room anywhere you go. Well your Brothers here at PXL want to save you from such ignominious peril, and all you need do is attend our most splendiferous decompression we're calling, "Penny Bar Hyjinx."
Beginning Thursday, September 20th, we'll be lighting up the west Kern oil country with some potent flatulence of our own. We'll clamp the weekend at Franklin Field Arena in Taft, and plaque the 115 year old Penny Bar in McKittrick. This is one Clampout you can't afford to miss, and if you sign-up early we'll even save you some dust in the process. Your redshirted brothers will be waiting. --MGM
- Read About our Fall Clampout and the Penny Bar Erection
- Register by Mail or Over the Internet
- Weekend Event Schedule
- PBC Sponsor Requirements and Handbook
- Rules for the Weekend
- Directions to the Franklin Field Arena
- A Personal Invitation from Our Humbug
- Heck, Just Give Me the Flyer Already!
- The Penny Bar Plaque
- Whom to Contact for More Information
Or click on the red arrow to continue.
Preregister and Save $15!
Brother, one of the best weekends to be had in all of Clamperdom can be yours for as little as $65, plus $75 for your PBC, but your dust must be in our hands one week ahead of our Fall Clampout to get this special rate. Use Paypal and we'll honor this price as late as Sunday, September 16th but snail mail applications must be postmarked no later than Friday, September 14th. After that it's $80, same as at the gate. NOTICE! Drop-in PBCs will not be admitted.
All PBCs must be vetted by September 7th -- one week before the close of the discount window. PBC sponsors can expect a call from the Humbug or his representative to make sure they have fulfilled their obligations as set out below. Retreads are $1,866 each until further notice. In other words, NO RETREADS!
Both your dust and an application form are required to secure our special rate. To register fill out and return our Infallible Fillable Flyer or use our handy electronic form below. We'll accept your dust by mail or Paypal. And remeber, regardless of how you sign-up, if your jackass gets sick, just call or email us at Registration@ECV1866.org before the start of the weekend, and our GDR will make sure you're comped for next time.
ECV Brothers who are on Active Military Duty who preregister by the prepay deadline get in free. Just mention it on your registration form and make sure to bring along with your military ID and a copy of your current orders.
All Chapter Hawkers are welcome to ply their goods. But be prepared to do some trading.
Sponsors should include a waiver form for each of their PBCs. Redshirts should include one for themselves if we don't already have one on file from a prior doin's. These waivers are an ECV wide policy imposed by Grand Council to help keep E Clampus Vitus in existence. Click here to read the waiver.
Are you a PBC paying separately from your Sponsor? No Problem! Just make sure to include your sponsor's name on the memo portion of your check or in the Paypal comment box. Postmark or Paypal by the deadline to get the early discount.
You can mail your application and rub to our Grand Noble Recorder at: Peter Lebeck #1866, c/o Mark "Pokey" Crawford, GNR, 18046 Beneda Lane #A106, Canyon Country, CA 91351, You can also Email your application to Registration@ECV1866.org, and use our Paypal Portal by clicking --><-- here.
PENNY BAR HYJINX SCHEDULE OF EVENTS WHO'DA THUNK'IT!
Thurs, Sept 20: Gates will be open at 1200 (12 noon). Foodwise you're on your own for Thursday's lunch & dinner & Friday's breakfast. FIRE BARRELS ARE OKAY -- "RETREADS, NO WAY!"
Fri, Sept 21: Gates will be open at 0700 (7:00 am). You will be on your own for breakfast & lunch.
10:00 am & 4:31 pm: Early Check-In at our Early Check-in Table.
5:03 pm: HUMBUG'S Meet and Greet at the PXL Tittie Bar. Belly Dancing by XNGH Russ "Hole" Chapman.
6:03 pm: Pasta Dinner, French Bread and Salad.
8:07 pm: PBCs must present themselves to the Hangman for survival instruction by the NGH & VNGH at the Bar.
8:15 pm: Clamper Poetry, Redshirt Tales & Karaoke.
PBCs should get a good SOBER night's sleep. Saturday is going to be a loooong day.
Sat, Sept 22: A great day of Clamping with the Brothers...
5:31 am: All PBCs report to the cookshack for our XNGH breakfast preparation/bonding ritual.
8:03 am: Potluck breakfast - We provide the EGGS! You bring sausage, ham, potatoes, tortillas, salsa, bacon, etc. Our XNGH cook team will prepare a meal guaranteed to cleanse your colon.
9:01 am: PBCs & sponsors check-in at the cookshack. PBCs will be Clean & Sober -- NO EYE OPENERS! Sponsors will enforce compliance. From here on in, PBCs who drink anything alcoholic prior to the Hall of Comparative Ovations will be denied Entry!
9:06 am: Redshirt check-in at the Check In Table (No Grub-stub, no meals). No Kiddin'.
10:16 am: Road Trip to the Penny Bar for our Plaquing Ceremony - ALL PBC's MUST ATTEND!
11:23 am: Road trip back to Taft Clampsite.
Noonish: Lunch at the cookshack.
1:02 pm: Our Historian will impart an ECV History Lesson to our would-be Brethren - All Redshirts are welcome.
2:33 pm: PBC interrogations, entertainment, bribes, presentations, tomfoolery, etc.
5:23 pm: Dinner- steak à la Airdale or chicken up-ur-ass with his Clamper beans & other vittles for your enjoyment.
7:15 pm: Necrology Ceremony (if needed) & Hall of Comparative Ovations.
8:15 pm: Raffle and Fireside fun - stories, jokes, male bonding, pass the bottle and the usual BS.
Sun, Sept 23: The dreaded "morning after."
7:00 am: A continental breakfast at the cook tent. Aspirin & Rolaids for those who survived.
8:09 am: Camp clean-up. Everybody helps, from XSNGH to XPBC!
10:06 am: Drive back to the real world. But, do it SOBER!! The CHP LOVES Clampers, especially near Taft.
The Brothers are reminded that all PBCs are guests of PXL, and PBC harassment is not allowed at any time by anyone other than our Hangman and his Vigilantes. PBCs are invited to meet and party with the Brothers on Friday, but from the time of their arrival PBCs will remain under the exclusive control and protection of our Hangman and are expected to be of service when asked. No Exceptions!
Click on the red arrow to continue.
"OUR HANGMAN SEZ!" Special PBC Requirements
ALL SPONSORS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE FOLLOWING:
Your PBC must be a fit subject to be taken into our order. If he's not good enough to hang with you, don't expect us to hang him for you. Your candidate must be of a good disposition, be willing to be of service, and have at least a nascent curiosity about history. He must arrive on time, have read the PBC Handbook, have a five minute historical resentation and an appropriate bribe for the board. His registration is due no later than September 7, 2018, and you should expect a call from the Humbug or his representative concerning whether your PBC is qualified and has been adequately prepared for his ordeal.
All PBC's must check in with our Grand Imperturbable Hangman Damon "Barney Trouble" Patterson upon entering the Clampsite. On Friday night at 8:07, all PBCs in camp must report to the cookshack for survival instructions from the Hangman and inspection by our Humbug and his Vice. Sorry, no Retreads this trip.
Any infirmities that might affect your PBC's ability to do moderately physical tasks MUST be disclosed to the Hangman. Vertigo, bad knees, bad ticker, claustrophobia, diabetes, all that stuff counts. No Exceptions! Failure to disclose could result in sheepskin denial and suspension of the PBC's sponsor.
Our initiation is not an endurance test! If you have a friend who wants to join PXL but has health issues we will figure out a way to get him through the initiation, but a failure to disclose a PBC's health problems endangers your PBC, it endangers us, and is not appreciated by anyone except those that want ECV® to go bye-bye.
PBCs may not wear RED until after completing their sacred ordeal. Finally, membership is open only to men 21 or older with good attitudes. These rules provide for the safety and fair treatment of your friend. As his sponsor it is your responsibility to make sure that he complies. Our initiation is a mind f**k. Do as you're told and no one gets hurt.
ALL PBCs ARE ADVISED:
That from the time of their arrival all PBCs are guests of the Brothers of Peter Lebeck, ECV and will be under the protection and control of our Hangman & his Vigilantes.
As is our custom at PXL, PBCs may fraternize with the Brethren on Friday but must show good attitude and submit to the directions of the Hangman from the time of their arrival, including being of service when so instructed by our Hangman.
All PBCs in Camp on Saturday Morning must report to the Cookshack as instructed for Kitchen Duty on pain of foregoing initiation. Last call for PBCs that did not join us on Friday is 8:03 a.m. Saturday morning. PBCs must be knowledgeable of all educational materials provided to them, especially the Handbook, be prepared to stand and deliver before our Board of Inquiry, and remain sober throughout the initiation. No Exceptions!
PXL adheres to all Grand Council Rules which will be strictly enforced. It will be a clean, but memorable initiation as befits our Honorable Order.
Click on the red arrow to continue.
These are the Rules--So Read 'em!
RULES FOR THE WEEKEND- read & follow them: We are the guests of the West Side Recreation and Park District. Make sure your diggin's are clean when you leave. Our reputation depends on it! Well behaved DOGS are welcome, but be prepared to kennel them or put them on a leash when necessary, and make sure you scoop their poop and that they do not harass the livestock! Burn barrel are also allowed this trip but keep a bucket of water nearby in case you need to put it out in a hurry. Ground friendly propane heaters are also welcome.
DO BRING: Water (dry camp), shade, raffle/auction prizes, water buckets, stuff for Saturday's potluck breakfast (but not eggs), libations for yourselves and your Brothers, good PBCs, ideas for PBC games and trash bags. Please bring personal hygiene items for the ladies and toys for the kids at the women's shelter in Bakersfield.
DON'T BRING: Dope, firearms, explosives (including females), eggs, weaponry, anyone under 21, pissy PBCs or any of the usual No-Nos. Violation means expulsion without refund. So, don't risk it. This applies to EVERYONE!
ALL PBCs must have a bribe for the board and an historical presentation, as well as their dust. PBCs will submit to the authority of our Hangman upon entry to the Clampsite and remain under his control through the Hall of Comparative Ovations. There will be absolutely NO PBC Harassment on Friday Night, and No Retreads without buying the Humbug an SUV.
NOTE WELL: This chapter respect and adheres to the rules of the Board of Proctors of E Clampus Vitus®, Inc.
REMEMBER - The PXL bar has snacks, sodas, iced tea and water. Want more? Bring it yourself.
Click on the red arrow to get directions.
So You Want Directions?
From Bakersfield and all points North on the 99: Take Highway 99 South to exit 18. Turn right onto Highway 119 (Taft Highway). Go west 27.7 miles towards Taft then turn left onto Ash Street. The entrance to Franklin Field Arena will be 0.2 miles on your left.
From all points North on the I-5: Take I-5 to exit 244. Turn right onto Highway 119 (Taft Highway). Go west 17.8 miles towards Taft then turn left onto Ash Street. The entrance to Franklin Field Arena will be 0.2 miles on your left.
From LA and all points South: Take I-5 North to exit 225. Turn left onto Highway 166 (Maricopa Highway). Go west 23 miles to Maricopa. At California Street turn right (north) onto Highway 33 and go 6.1 miles towards Taft. As you pass the West Kern Oil Museum keep to your right and take Highway 119 (Taft Highway) for 1.2 miles to Ash Street then turn right. The entrance to Franklin Field Arena will be 0.2 miles on your left.
Franklin Field Arena, Ash Street Entrance (0.2 miles east of Taft Highway), Taft, CA 93268
GPS Coordinates for the Franklin Field Arena gate: 35° 9' 5.3" N, 119° 26' 37.8" W
Click on the Map's Links to Go Large and for Google Directions
For more information contact:
Al "The Quack" Price, NGH (661) 867-2414 or email@example.com
Mark "Pokey" Crawford, VNGH (661) 993-7907 or Crawford562@Yahoo.com
Myrl "Doc" Wallace, Clampatriarch (805) 937-0156 or BigWallace@comcast.net
Mike "MGM" Ramirez-Mares, Cyberrecorder (818) 517-8781 or Cyberrecorder@ECV1866.org